You Know it's a Slow day at Work When.....

You spent 10 min reading from the Costco Connection Magazine that you just got in the mail, and focused on the article about their foodcourt, and how they have a new hotdog!

Dear Brenton,

Hi Sugar....remember me...it's Jazmine:

No not the crazy Jazmine, the Jazmine you met years ago and liked, heck I think you even said you loved me. Well I know I have been gone for a while now, and I bet you are wondering what you did wrong to drive me away. I want you to know, it's not you...it's ME!

I wanted to stay around, believe me I did, but there just wasn't enough room for the three of us. You know, you, me and that crazy girl. I KNOW that you would rather hang with me instead of the crazy girl, I do too. I mean so many times when she is going on and on, I'm like "shut up" but she doesn't listen. Or all the times when she is saying mean sarcastic comments, I just keep telling her, "he's not going to like that, maybe you shouldn't say it" and guess what?? She says it anyway! Man, I don't know what it's going to take to get rid of her, but someday, yes someday I plan on coming back into your life, and we can be happy again...like ol' times.

And when I come and get you from school you will see the happy smiling Jazmine that was just so fun to be around. Not the red puffy faced girl that had been bawling before you even got in the car... like you saw last night (don't worry I had a talk with her, she should be good for a few days!) I just remember the look on your face, you looked so scared!

Anyway, it's almost good golfing weather, so please use that time to escape from HER! Really it's okay!

I love you, and miss you! Someday we'll be together again. I hope!

Remember this? This is our first official "COUPLE" pic! Aunt Terri took this for us!

You have done so well with dealing with THIS girl...uggghh why won't she just leave???

Counting Down What?

I have this wonderful reminder on my blog, some of you have seen it

But today I looked at it and thought....108 days to go...

• Until my stomach stops growing like I swallowed the earth...it will all go straight to my hips like before!!
• Until I can lay flat on my back without out worrying about what will happen if I stay there too long
• Until my getting up 2 maybe 3 times a night is no longer voluntary it's mandatory
• Until sleeping in on Saturdays is no longer a possibility
• Until it will take me 3 hours to get ready to leave the house vs. 1 hr
• Until The Brenton and I lose all grown-up conversations and we just discuss how many times she pooped that day!
• Until Mom's that previously ignored me because I had no children, will all of the sudden start talking to me (you know what I'm talking about...the church moms)
• Until I can no longer use the phrase, "Oh Sorry honey, I didn't mean to say that, it's the pregnancy!"
• Until my tardiness will be accepted by everyone, mom's with kids always get out of being judged for being late.
• Until my mom will get to say, "what goes around comes around Jazzy!" every time I call her crying because my daughter is CRAZY!
• Until my brothers will stop saying, "Jazz you're a ton of fun"...they are heartless boys!

And of course a list for The Brenton:

• Until he will no longer have a crazy crying girl in his house...he will have TWO!! HAHAHA
• Until he will put his nose up to a butt to check for a dirty diaper
• Until his gag reflex will be tested atleast once a day
• Until being on time means we're only 20 min late
• Until he gets to drive in a car with a screaming child and still try to keep his cool
• Until he gets to carry around the bright pink sparkly diaper bag that I am thinking about buying, just to cause him public humiliation....sorry it's the pregnancy that makes me think of these mean thoughts! :)

108 days to go...and lovin' every day until we get there!

Would UPS have done it??

I imagine his morning went something like this:



"Where are my keys...ahhh I can't find my keys!!" he must have looked in all his usual places



"Honey where are the keys, I am going to be late to work!" no one could find his keys....so as a result he grabs his spare keys and runs out the door.



I am sure he admired the fact that it was a BEAUTIFUL Salt Lake morning, with 50...that's right 50 degrees!!



As he drives, he looks at the clock and punches the gas a little harder so that he doesn't get the parking spot all the way in the back....



Stopped at a red light, he notices a FedEx Van behind him, and the driver gets out of the Van and starts walking toward his car....the back of his car...he does something and then walks towards the driver side....the man must have noticed all the other cars around, and the drivers looking and wondering what is going on...



The man rolls down the window and the FedEx man hands him his keys....YES he left them in the trunk!!!



The man notices the pretty girl in the gold Suzuki (that is very dirty because her husband REFUSES to wash the car during the winter.."it's only going to get dirty again!" uhhh....sorry on with the story) smiling as she watches the FedEx guy get back in his Van and continue on with his glorious day of delivering packages!

Goodbye Bank Account, Hello SHOES!!!

HALLELUJA!!! I would like to first thank the city of Sandy for approving the building of the Nordstrom's rack, secondly I would like to apologize to The Brenton for all of the time and money I will spend at this store!

Yes I know there is a Nordstroms rack 20 min from my house, however it is kind of "ghetto" yes I'll say it... ghetto!

So thank you for opening a new store closer to my home! BRING ON THE SHOES!!!!

3 ...2...1.. Contact!!!

Well Houston, we have made contact, and The Brenton has finally felt the wonderful soccer player/boxer that has been moving around for the last 4 weeks...

It's funny because just yesterday we were talking with family because our little Peanut has a cousin that is barely 10 days younger than her, and they have been able to both feel ol' Muffin move and groove...

Obviously our little Peanut doesn't like to be known as the "Weak One" as I called her, and so today she kicked harder and more often to prove her point...Looks like reverse psychology works on her!

So as I was laying down to go to bed, and literally I was going from the seated position down to the lying position, I had the weirdest feeling that I have not felt before. I seriously thought Brenton had reached around and poked my stomach hard (which he knows better to do because poking my stomach = death in this house)...I asked him if he did that..of course he had no idea what I was talking about....

so here is the explanation...my stomach isn't a nice cute round firm belly, it has character and is a little, shall we say "pliable" So I when I sit down there is an equator line that divides the north from the south pole. I think Peanut got a foot/leg/arm or something right in the equator and as I bent down it squished it, I am sure it frightened her as much it did me!

Lets just hope it wasn't her face! 23 weeks!

A Whole NEw World!!!

The Brenton has been learning a new language since last fall so that leads me to the following videos...they are awesome



AND




I think they sound a whole lot better in the other language, however they are harder to sing-a-long to...

The Secret

Did you guys see Oprah on this "Secret"??? The idea is you put this thought out there in the universe and if you keep putting out positive thinking... it happens....so here I go..this is me using the secret.....

Getting Tan on a nice warm beach..and Pablo my cabana boy bringing me a refreshing drink!

Cold Crips Watermelon that you eat at every BBQ!!!!

Saturday's at 11-1..you will find The Brenton and I here

Mmmm...need I say More??

The Need to get your toes scrubbed and polished from all the sandal wearing

Cooking over Propane because we're CAMPING!

COME ON SUMMER!!!!!!!!!!!

Home at Last

Wheewww we made it home. Due to mother nature our quick CA weekend trip ended up with a day extra and I'll tell you what, we are beat. Good thing we all have a huge pillow to come home to. Hope you all had a great weekend!

Dedication or Stubborn????

Presidents Day Weekend = Long weekend when I can go see my family without taking work off+not too pregnant to drive 10+hours...so we headed to CA!

We got news that it could snow on our way, we got chains(which was a fantastic idea because we used them TWICE! The Brenton...he did such a good job putting them on, and taking them off...I did really good about reading the directions and turning the steering wheel! TEAMWORK!) we packed our car with extra blankets and food and water....we were ready....it started off like thisThe last 4 hours were...amazing from 3am-7am it was like this (view from our windshield)13 Hrs later we arrived to our wonderful destination....my mom's house!

Now we are getting ready to do it all again on Monday! Yes we could have stayed home and avoided the dangers of driving in nasty weather, but I need to visit the homeland ever-so-often...plus who doesn't jump at the chance to see their mom?

Instructions on How to Almost get Penned by a Pregnant Woman

Location: Now this is very important, you want to be on a college campus when it's dark outside, say 6:50pm-7pm, make sure that the Campus is in kind of a sketchy area!

Step 1: Find a pregnant girl who is walking across a big parking lot and who has to cross the street to get to where her car is parked (make sure this girl is a paranoid girl, due to all of the episodes of "UNSOLVED MYSTERIES" that she watched as a child!)

Note: This girl should be walking by the bus stop and have to go behind the overhang area where there is just a solid cement wall and perfect!

Step 2: Once the pregnant girl gets to where not many others can see her, and she has to walk across a bridge next to the portables where it's lit but still very scary...that is when you start walking closer and closer..oh and make sure that you walk very loud so that she knows that you are getting closer

Step 3: Coordinate your timing so that there are other people walking by, so she isn't scared, just very JUMPY! And when you finally come side by side with this girl, make sure that there is a second guy walking behind her, so she really becomes aware of her surroundings.

Step 4: Don't just pass the girl, no no walk next to her obviously invading her comfort zone.

Step 5: Make sure that she has a clicky pen in her right hand and have her other hand getting ready to grab her keys

Step 6: Just keep on walking by, like an idiot who just doesn't know how to give someone her personal space while you two are walking in a parking lot AT NIGHT!!!

My New BFF!!!

(the pillow...not the pregnant woman)

Oh Boppy...thank you for being there to snuggle me at night, Brenton did the best he could but A. He rolls too much and B. He generates enough heat for our whole apartment. Boppy, my back and hips no longer hurt! THANK YOU BOPPY THANK YOU!!!

No Pressure

Dear Peanut:

I just want to give you a little heads up...you are going to be grandchild #12 for Aby Joyner. 12!! We are going to have to think of something good to make you stand out, because as of right now, anything cute you do....it's been done 12 times before...

I know you think that you could do a cute dance or something, no sorry, I mean we have Adam's butt dance, how can you beat that?? You think, Oh I'll just be smart...No have you seen your cousin Anna she was born a genus. We can already throw out the evil genius, we have way too many of those... Sad I know, but really...don't worry I have a plan for you.

None of these kids speak Spanish...and the fastest way to Aby's heart is through Spanish, I mean look at Uncle Tim, how else do you think he got to marry Aunt Jamie?????

So I will get you a tutor and we will work on our Spanish. In the mean time, keep cookin' and work on those looks that I told you about, you know the ones that will get your daddy to forget the trouble you caused!

LOVE YOU,

Your crazy mama!

The RING

No I am not talking about the one dealing with Hobbits...I am talking about the one that I gave to my husband Aug 5, 2006 (okay so he got it a couple days earlier, I am a sucker)

Anyway, ON CHRISTMAS this year, Brenton was being so kind as to scrape the 4 inches of snow off the car before we left to drive (in a HORRIBLE snow storm) home.

It was about hour and a half into the drive that Brenton looks down and Ahhh...his ring is gone!!

His poor cold finger shrank so that his ring just fell right off without him feeling it!

Well me being a very awesome wife, calls the jeweler that we bought it from originally and orders the SAME EXACT RING....

The jeweler is in CA, and we are going to be out there over Valentine's Day weekend and so I had a plan to give it to him on Valentines Day (it was going to be a surprise however I am a sucker and he asked if I ordered it...I told him no...and then 20 seconds later told him I did! What was I supposed to do, he asked me at CHURCH? I can't lie at church!!)

So we have the ring all ready for him next week, and he gets a phone call from his dad....why you ask??? Because his dad just so happened to stumble across my hubby's ring today!!!

I'll tell you what, my Brenton was so happy, it made his day, his week almost! And so he and his ring will be reunited once again on Sat! And I called the jeweler and YES they did allow me to return the ring... so I don't have to pay for a new ring (which costs more the second time you buy it, we are in a recession!) THANK YOU LINCOLN JEWELERS for being so great and letting me return it!!!

The Basics

So everyone says "Just stick to the basics" when it comes to buying things for our precious bundle of baby...and so Brenton and I have purchased a few diaper packages, a few onesie sets....and are still debating on what is the perfect pacifier....

We know there are more things that we will have to start purchasing, but what are the basics? I mean, are a bunch of hair bows and headbands with flowers the size of her head...is that basic? (because I am already wanting to get those!) Are shoes part of the basics, when will I need those?

Is a Bobby a basic or extravagant? Can I get a baby swing and one of those small chairs that have music and vibrate too??? Or am I just being greedy??

The big baby store over here gave me a checklist for the "New Mom" and about 200 products later they said I'll be ready....HA, I say..HA!